You're The Wanker, If Anyone Is

Let me start by saying that I have never broken a bone. Ever. Maybe a couple of jammed fingers here and there but never a break, sprain, or fracture in sight. I was a little proud of the fact that this was the case, but alas, I will forever have to put down a finger whenever someone mentions it during Ten Fingers.

I fractured some small bone in my foot, and it's probably the lamest story ever. It usually goes like this:


"Nick?! What happened?"

"I fractured a bone in my foot."

"Shoot, that totally sucks. How'd it happen?"

"...Umm...Well...I slipped off a curb and landed on the side of my foot."

Laughter/Mocking/Shame Ensues




Usually people have cool stories. Saving a child from a burning building. Defending your girlfriend's honor. Base jumping. Shoot, sports injuries are fine too, but slipping off a curb is not in that cool story category, and I'll just have to live with that. As much as I hate that it happened, I can't really go back in time to fix it so I'll have to deal with the swollen, uncomfortableness that will be around for the next few weeks.

I'd like to be all excited and optimistic about the new opportunities that this could bring, but it's a little hard to do that when you're hobbling around on crutches all day.


Here's to hoping I don't punch small children out of rage.


^Joke...I'm not actually that mad.